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Wheaton's Law [explicit]

from Aim To Misbehave by The PDX Broadsides

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about

In honor of Wil Wheaton's famous phrase, an educational track on behaviors not to emulate.

NSFW: Contains the 'a-hole' word once. And 'dick' several times.

lyrics

Your roommates would like you to know
They can hear your nocturnal activity
And they say it wouldn’t be so bad (so bad)
If your girlfriend didn’t have a proclivity
We all know she’s quite fulfilled
She screams just like she’s being killed
We’re happy that you love her crotch (her crotch)
But could you take it down a notch?

CHORUS:
Don’t be a dick, don’t be a dick, don’t be a dick
Wil's advice is wise, so use this simple trick
Treat others well, it’s Wheaton’s Law, and we hope it sticks
So when in doubt...
Don’t be a dick

You told your friends to meet at three o’clock
They’ve been waiting, and now it’s - after four
Paid their tab and now they’re gonna go (bye bye)
When you finally come strolling - in the door
You didn’t think to text or call
And you don’t get why they’re mad at all
‘Cause there were other things to do
And they’re not being fair to you

CHORUS

Someone is wrong on the internet
SOMEONE is WRONG on the INTERNET
Don’t let a troll ruin your whole day
Shut them down when they start
Someone is wrong on the internet
SOMEONE is WRONG on the INTERNET
The unfriend button is just a click away
The unfriend button in your heart

Park in handicap, ‘cause you’ll be “just a sec”
And use express lanes when you have a full cart
Don’t let people merge on the highway (beep beep)
Blame someone else and walk away when you fart
Touching people without permission
Sneaking in events without admission
Being a sexist, racist, asshole kind of guy (that guy)
Or swiping the last piece of pie

CHORUS

Don’t be a dick, don’t be a dick, don’t be a dick
Wil's advice is wise, so use this simple trick
If you have to ask, it’s probably wrong, so let this message click
So when in doubt...
Don’t be a dick

credits

from Aim To Misbehave, released May 26, 2015

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about

The PDX Broadsides Portland, Oregon

The PDX Broadsides (Portland, OR)
pdxbroadsides.com
are a trio of nerd enthusiasts who sing about science, piracy, superheroes, robots, and other geeky topics with great vigor and harmony. Formed in September 2011 on accident in a crucible of exhaustion, excessive coffee and too much wine, they deliver original nerdy tunes and geek parodies. ... more

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